A Place For Everything

It’s Saturday. About 11:00am. I am still in my PJ’s and have managed to be unproductive but busy all morning. I am debating whether I should shower and then clean the house or clean and then shower…I decide fifteen more minutes on the computer and then shower. No one is here to notice my derelict behavior so why not?

I’m about eight minutes into my fifteen when the phone rings.

Hello?

Pumpkin, it’s me.

Hey Pump-

Remember those tickets we got from Jean?

No, what tickets?

Listen, I’m on my way home to get them. You have to find them.

I just said I don’t know what tickets. Jean who?

Jean and Ted Jean.

Jean and Ted?

Jean and Ted!

From work?

Yes! They gave us free tickets to the racetrack remember? Where are they?

Where are Jean and Ted?

No. The tickets!

Pumpkin, I gave those to you for safe keeping.

No.

Yes.

No.

When were they for?

Today!

Today? Are you sure, I thought-

Listen! I am on my way home to get them because I ran into a couple who are going to the track today and I told them we had four tickets and would only be using two.

What couple?

Hank and Elaine. They are following me home to pick them up because they are on their way to the track now. I am on the scooter so I can’t talk on the phone and drive and they are waiting to follow me to pick up the tickets, you have to find the tickets and I have to get off the phone.

Elaine from work?

Yes! Are you looking for the tickets?

They are coming here? I haven’t showered! Are they coming in? Are we supposed to go with them to the track now? I have to get ready! I don’t know where you put the tickets, I remember giving them to you, we were standing in the kitch-

No honey, you did not give them to me.

Yes.

No.

Yes. Did you look in your wallet?

Listen! I have to hang up now.  I don’t have the tickets. You need to find where you put them. Maybe in your kitchen drawer?

Fine!  Be sure to look in your truck when you get here!

I hang up and march into our room (with attitude) and look in the top drawer of his nightstand where I KNOW I will find the tickets.

Except they are not there. I look all over the nightstand. I look on his dresser. I look in the top drawer two more times.

No tickets. Where the hell would he have put them? I bet they are in his wallet. Or in his truck.

I look on my desk.

I stalk back to the bedroom to check the top drawer again because I KNOW I gave him those tickets.

I decide I will look in my kitchen drawer. The drawer that holds all-things-important-that-will-need-to-be-retrieved-easily-and-will-never-get-lost. I only look there so I can truthfully tell Bob that yes, I searched everywhere and maybe he should start remembering where he put them. I am quite agitated with him at this point because he claims he is the organized one and here I am searching in my drawer where I know they will most definitely not be when…I find them.

When Bob gets home I wave the tickets at him and say guess where I found these? “They were in the top drawer of your nightstand!”

 

 

 

 

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